Bible Study Part #7
Health & Marriage
“It Takes Twoooo Babeh…”
“At times this has been an issue in our marriage. Because Ken has worked so hard to stay fit, it bothers him a great deal when I don’t make the same effort.” – unknown author
Here’s a challenge: Begin thinking about your health and wellness as one way to serve your partner. I’m referring to longevity with your spouse and the quality of that longevity.
Let me share a little story about “Jack and Diane”. I’ve watched Diane spend her retirement caring for her beloved husband Jack. Due to the poor health choices he’s made over many decades, the strife in their marriage is astronomical. Their retirement is very different from what they both had anticipated.
“This isn’t what we planned…”
Jack and Diane pictured their retirement being full of travel, rest, and grand-kids while they enjoyed their retirement savings. Now, that money is spent on medical bills. Instead of traveling to places near and far, they spend their days traveling to doctor’s appointments and rarely see their grandchildren.
According to his doctors, Jack’s current health issues are a direct result of poor health decisions made over time. While Jack has made significant changes to his diet and exercise routine, the lingering affects of these decisions will affect the quality of both their lives as long as they both shall live.
The story might have been different had Jack given his all in stewarding his health along the way.
We can’t control our genetics or the fact that things happen and people get sick. However, we control the choices we make regarding all five areas of our health and wellness.
Body Image Invades the Marriage Bed
“USA Today reports that the #1 reason women avoid physical intimacy is because they feel uncomfortable with how their body looks.”
“My wife may weigh a bit more than the typical supermodel, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love how she looks, so as long as she’s happy with herself, I’m great.” – Paul, age 37
“My wife’s hips have gotten a little wider through the years, and her breasts may have fallen a little southward since I fell in love with her over thirty years ago. But when I consider the four beautiful children who’ve passed through those hips and nursed at those breasts, I’m more in awe of them than ever. To everyone else, she’s a grandma. To me, she’s a goddess, and I celebrate her presence in my life every day.” – Terry, age 59
“I’ve been trying to tell my wife for eighteen years that she’s beautiful, but she won’t believe me. She makes me feel like I must be crazy to think she’s sexy, and sometimes I’m tempted to just believe her. But I refuse to do that. I want her to believe me instead [because] I know what I see when I look at her. I just want her to feel the same way about herself.”
On the flip side, Bradley Universityfound that “men share women’s body image struggles and consequences of negative body image, it’s just their concerns are different.” Healthy Families Start with Healthy Leaders
ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!
Ephesians 5:25-33 “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband”.
Clearly , we see that men are called to be leaders. Remember that. Display that. Lead well. Be the example. “Husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies”. Feeding and caring for the body with a compassionate heart encourages and equips in the way of wellness.
“…Just Me & You…”
We’ve seen it over and over again. One spouse makes the choice for change and to pursue “well-th” while the other does not. Jealousy, bitterness, depression, and anger may result in the relationship. When you said “I do”, you committed to ‘we do’. Take the journey together. Share the struggles, share the burdens, share the wins, share the celebrations! One person trying to live to a certain standard won’t last long when everyone else around them lives contrary a contrary lifestyle.
Don’t “just do it”. Bring the family along the journey. True change, true transformation, longevity in health is found when EVERYONE is on board. Two different health paths do not promote unity within the family. Health and wellness is a lifestyle not an activity that one participates on Tuesday nights. It’s not a softball league, it’s a journey. And in order to find success, everyone needs to be on the same trail (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
- What are we doing to our relationship with our spouse when we are caught in the trap of comparison?
- Remember, Comparison kills Contentment!
- How are you leading your family with respect to health and wellness?
- In what areas does your leading need some refinement?
Godspeed,
The MissionFiT Team
